Uncomfortable

I am so much less "comfortable" in the winter.







The water has to run longer while I wait for my shower to warm up. I shiver until the van heats up and between us ladies, I've been known to wear a wool cap to bed. (Stacy and Clinton would be appalled, I assure you, but on some nights it's necessary.) I'm a vitamin D kind of gal. I LOVE the sunshine and in the winter she deliberately seems to hide as if she is purposefully hibernating.

To be honest, I'm just not as "comfortable" in the winter.

I've spent my share of winters up north, way up north. I know that winter is not always comfortable, and yet it's often in winter where unknown treasures lie and only in "uncomfortable" circumstances, when all is stripped away, can they be revealed.

I was reminded of this just the other day. As we were traveling on a country road that I've driven a number of times, I noticed out my window a lake. A lake that had revealed itself through the naked trees. A lake that I'd never noticed before. A gorgeous lake.

Isn't that just like winter?

Just like winter to reveal something hidden; something that's always been there, just hidden behind the layers that camouflage.

Isn't that just like God?

He has done it a number of times in my own life. Used an uncomfortable "winter season" of my life to reveal something that was there all along, but hidden. Hidden away, waiting for the Lord to strip away the layers that camouflage to reveal what He needed to expose. My winter.

I don't know about you, but I often exist selfishly, seeking comfortable circumstances.

Thankfully there are times that God says, "no," or "not now." I move into my own spiritual winter. It's a bitter cold season of life where comforts cease to exist. It's clearly not comfortable. It's not meant to be. It's often downright painful, and if you are like me, you try to resist it. You try to ignore it, or run the other direction, or pull the hat over your eyes, but He won't let you. You see there is so much to be revealed in these times.

Just as it's comforting to know without a doubt that winter inevitably moves into spring, my spirit is comforted by these words,

"Be truly glad!" There is wonderful joy ahead, even though it is necessary for you to endure many trials for awhile. These trials are only to test your faith, to show that it is strong and pure. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold....So if your faith remains strong after being tried by fiery trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus is revealed to the whole world."
1 Peter 1:6-7

Learning to embrace the uncomfortable, to expose what has been camouflaged for far too long. Now that's something to think about.







Join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she is learning to embrace winter in all forms!

Put the Scissors Down

I think it began with a Barbie Styling Head.

It was a dream gift, but eventually combing and styling became a bore. I began to snip. I was Vidal Sasson; I was a hairdressing diva. My cosmetology career began and ended at 6.

At 40, growing my bangs out sounded like a wonderful idea. It sounded easy. My hairdresser recently said it was time for a change and long bangs were "hip."

She had me at "hip."

It sounded like a simple plan. All I had to do was wait. It was easy; easy until about 6 weeks into it. Easy until the day I woke up and could no longer take it. With scissors in hand, I became my own "Barbie Styling Head."

I know better. I've been down this road many, many times before. We all know how this ends.

So, I snipped away. Took control of it. The results as you can imagine were not the results I desired. Walking in wearing a baseball cap, I knew that sooner rather than later I was going to have to "fess up" and tell my hairdresser.

"Ms. Kay, I trimmed my own bangs."

"I can tell," she replied, with a sheepish smile on her face.

"Why didn't you just let me do it?" she inquired, snickering.

"I just thought...." It was no use. I just thought what? I'd help her out? No, I should have let her do it in the first place.

How often do I do the same with God?

I try and take control of a situation in my life, you know, "help Him out." I snip, snip, snip at a situation in my life. A situation that clearly does not need my intervention, but rather my surrendering control to the Lord. Just as Ms. Kay shook her head, I imagine that the Lord shakes His head at me, and speaks the same words to me that He spoke to Peter.

"What little faith you have! Why did you doubt?" (Matthew 14: 31)

I need to leave my hair style to the experts and I need to leave His will in my life to Him. He clearly does not need me taking scissors to my own life, "snipping here and there." The ending is always the same. I come back to the one that I should have gone to in the first place. He needs my submission to His will. He needs me to put down the scissors and have a little faith. You know, actually living the words, "thy will be done."

I'm still learning.

I've hidden the scissors...really well this time.







Join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she resolves this year to NOT pick up the scissors.

I Would Have Missed It...

Let's be honest.

Things haven't changed THAT much in 2,010 years. Women are women, always have been. We are busy, we have to watch out for gossip and did I mention, we're busy?

If I had been alive THEN it likely would have looked a bit like this:

I imagine that if I would have been up before the cock crowed and I would have gone about the chores of the day.

I would have fetched the water, I would have fed the baby, I would have swept out the barn, (even though it was supposed to be somebody else's chore.)

I would have fed the animals.

I would have made the bread. (Wondering outloud, how in the world can these people of mine eat so much?)

I would have pressed some olives and drawn some water from the well.

I would have mended somebody's tunic that had gotten mysteriously ripped. (Time for the "play tunics" talk again.)

I would have made my way to the market.

I would have conversed with the women in the market, always trying to stop short of gossiping.

I would have 'heard' the rumors, everyone heard the rumors

I would have returned home, put the fire on; I would have made dinner and I would have put the babies to bed, and I would have taken one last look around our home before turning in for the night.

I would have looked up in the night sky, and simply not noticed that THIS night was different.

So we fast~forward 2,010 years, welcome to my world!

I get up before the alarm goes off, and I begin my day. I spend some time in quietly praying before my feet hit the floor.

Then it's off the bathroom for a shower and make~up, so as not to terrify the UPS man.

I would complete the never ending pile of laundry, and find myself mending the jeans that have mysteriously gotten ripped; need to have the "play" clothes talk again.

I would move on to emptying the dishwasher, (even though it was supposed to be somebody else's chore.)

The list of daily tasks would go on and on, you know it, you live it. Addressing the cards, calling a friend, responding to emails, braving the mall traffic, wrapping the gifts, waiting in the endless post office line, going to the grocery, going back to the grocery to get what I forgot the first time, chauffeuring my people to dance and basketball, remembering the teacher gifts!

The list continues and I find myself unloading the groceries, (wondering how these people of mine can eat so much) making dinner, tucking everyone in, unplugging the tree and the outdoor lights, and finally pausing to look up at the stars in the night sky.

Our lives with all their modern conveniences really haven't changed that much.



She missed it 2,000 years ago, not because she intended to. Sure she had heard the rumors swirling all about the town. Rumors of a baby born in a manger. She MEANT to be there, but she was just too BUSY.





The truth is, I am her. I am that same woman in Bethlehem 2,000 years ago.





Simply too busy to notice WHAT was going on around her.


The blessing in hindsight is that I can learn from her, the lesson of a lifetime. The heavenly hosts will announce it, the shepherds will find their way, the Kings will bring gifts, and as every woman who has ever walked before me, I have an opportunity to notice the significance of this night, the opportunity to notice the significance of the life of Jesus.

I silently vow that I will not be immersed in my own busyness that I miss it. I WILL see that star in sky; the star of HOPE, the star of LOVE, the star who welcomed GOD, coming to dwell with us. The star that whispers still today, "Be still and KNOW that I am God." (Psalm 46:10)






join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she is listening for the whisper this season....

Inquiring Minds Want to Know

When I wanted an answer, daddy made me "look it up." "Looking it up, pre Google, you know, back in the day, meant lugging out that monstrosity of a book called the encyclopedia, remember them? My kids don't.

I have to thank grandma too. More than once I heard her say, "inquiring minds want to know." (with a wink) Not exactly an educational pursuit, more of a supermarket field trip, but inquiring none the less.


Even today these influences are part of my personality. Sometimes I can't just accept the things I read, I need to know more. Just the other day, I came across an excerpt from a book by Oswald Chamber, and my "Inquiring Mind" begged to know more.

"We are not built for the mountains and the dawns and aesthetic affinities, those are for moments of inspiration, that is all. We are built for the valley, for the ordinary stuff we are in, and that is where we have to prove our mettle."
~Oswald Chamber

"Moment's of inspiration, that is ALL?"

"Built for the valley, ordinary stuff?"

WHAT?

Thankfully, with Google at my fingertips, my inquiring mind and I went deeper.

In the preceding text, Chamber's says;

"The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend; if we have the power to rise only, something is wrong. It is a great thing to be on the mount with God, but a man only gets there in order that afterwards he may get down among the devil-possessed and lift them up."

Let me tell you something, I love the lawnchair view.

The view from the top. The final ascent. Sitting in my lawnchair on the TOP of the mountain, sun shining, no distractions, breeze blowing through my hair and I am soaking it all in...maybe even getting a tan.

Then it's as if the lawn chair is being shaken,

"Go on, get off! Shoo! Fold it up and get a move on it sister. You weren't meant to STAY here girlfriend! Oh no honey, I need you back in the valley."


The proof of my 'mettle,' (or as Miriam Webster defines it, 'vigor and strength of spirit,') is when I get off my derriere, pick up my lawn chair, and come down off the mountain where I caught a 'glimpse' of heaven and the glory of God. Those times on the mountain are where God 'refuels' us! He uses those moments to refresh our souls and invigorate our spirits!

Peter, James and John could not stay on the mountain where the Transfiguration occurred, (LUKE 9:28 ~36) they had to descend to the valley, where the lowly were living and teach them and inspire them with what they had seen and knew to be the truth.

We are no different, we are called to do the same. Come down! The mountain is a lovely place, it's a safe place. We however, were not meant to climb to the top, unfold our lawn chairs, spread out our blankets and stay.

Oh, maybe for a bit, to take it all in, but our spirits should want to descend to those valleys of the mundane and the trials of life. Girlfriend, WE are, after all, modern day disciples! (I know, I don't often feel like a 'disciple,' but we are! How AMAZING is that?? You and I, disciples!)

We are the ones who are now called to come down and 'share' what we have seen. We are the vessels with which the Lord wishes to use to encourage others to climb to the top and experience that 'glimpse.' We are modern day disciples sharing what we have learned on our journey, sharing so that others can begin their ascent, to catch their glimpse, and for a bit, experience their own lawn chair view.

If you close your eyes, you can almost imagine it, disciples on their way up, and those making the descent, (I imagine us high five~ing as we pass each other on the way) and so it continues on, until the end of time.

That mountain top view is lovely, I have seen it. I've unfolded my lawnchair and lingered at the top, and truth be told, I've been tempted to permanently cement my chair up there. But I was not meant to LIVE there.

"Those who do not take up their cross and follow in my steps are not fit to be my disciples." Matthew 10:38 (GNT)

I was meant to here in this valley, the valley of mini vans and hurting neighbors. The valley of troubled teens and grumpy co-workers. The valley of dysfunctional families, the tired, misunderstood and unchurched.

So, confidently, I fold my chair and begin to walk down, grateful and humbled by the experience to have another view from 'up there.' It is with sleeves rolled up, I descend to do some real work. You know, 'proving my mettle!'

I remain always confident that HE has another 'view from the top' waiting for me, to encourage and refuel me on my way. I'm certain that the lawn chair will not be permanently hidden, just put away, for exactly the time He determines another 'glimpse' is needed.

As I descend, I'm reminded that it pays to have an "inquiring mind." Thanks gram!






join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she'll happily let you borrow her lawn chair.

Taking Care of the Temple

We sat at breakfast and I reminded everyone that I had a doctor's appointment.


"For what?" asked my 9 year old.


"I have to have a test done that detects breast cancer, a mammogram."


"Oh yeah, on Sunday Night Football the players were wearing pink shoes and hats because it's breast cancer month. It was cool."


He dumped his cereal milk in the sink and he was off.




The girls lingered.


"What exactly do they do at a mammogram?"

I described the procedure and they looked with twisted faces and giggled, "Have fun!"

I laughed at them and quipped, "Just taking care of the temple."

The older one smiled and they were off.

It was certainly NOT the way I'd choose to spend a glorious October afternoon. You KNOW what I mean! Truth was that insurance tempted me to just "skip" it this year. The hassle that I had gone through nearly had me throwing up my hands and saying, "I don't have time for this."

And then the subtle voice that recalls a verse at the right time....the Holy Spirit whispering.

"Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?"

1 Corinthians 6:19

"I know, I know, blah, blah, blah... I do take care of my body. I eat well, exercise, get enough sleep, (usually)," I chatted back.

"Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. Your grandmother had cancer and you need to do this"

I knew what I needed to do. I called, fought with insurance and made the appointment.

It REALLY isn't that bad. A bit awkward, comical really, but necessary. It is October and because of one woman's battle with breast cancer and a sister who would not let her death be in vain, we SEE the reminders everywhere this month. If you haven't made your appointment for your yearly exam, and you're over 40, and you know who you are, it's time.

If you haven't reached the big four ~ oh....then visit the Susan G. Komen site and get educated. As women we are in this together. As Christian women, we need to encourage each other on the journey.

It's all part of taking care of the Temple.

This month is you are a breast cancer survivor please leave a comment so that we can pray for you. Your stories of survival inspire us and encourage so many of us.







Join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she is ever trying to take care of "her Temple."

Come Prepared

Each week I have an art lesson. These lessons were meant to be an extracurricular activity for my children, but as they have gotten older I have had the privilege of joining them in this expression of creativity. Each week when we arrive, our instructor asks us to do a few simple drawing exercises.


We have to get into our right hemisphere.

Admittedly, I spend much of my life here on earth taking care of left brain tasks; paying bills, grocery shopping, laundry, emptying the dishwasher, shuttling people to and fro. These activities require little creativity, or "right brain" function. But art, now that is a different story.



Our instructor insists that moving into our right hemispheres is critical to art and original creativity. She reminds us weekly that without this transition, our best expression of art and creativity are not possible. There are times that getting into my "right mind" is hard work. I have to WORK at shutting my left brain interferences out, or my artwork will not be a reflection of my true creativity.

One morning, as I was sitting down to quiet time with the Lord, I had a revelation.

Much like art class, many times coming to the Lord disconnected from the noise is hard work. The day's distractions bombard me. Much like my art class, I must find a way to leave those things at the door. Moving from my world into His. If distractions interfere with my time with Him, I will not ever hear completely what He is trying to communicate to me.

Rather than preparing my brain, I have to prepare my heart.

How can I prepare my heart when my heart longs for real intimacy with God?

When we have met our Lord in the silent intimacy of our prayer, then we will also meet Him . . . in the market, and in the town square. But when we have not met Him in the center of our own hearts, we cannot expect to meet Him in the busyness of our daily lives.
Henri Nouwen

Just as I have a series of exercises that I need to do to prepare this brain for art class, the same can be said for my quiet time with God. If a few simple exercises work in art class, why should it surprise me that a few simple exercises work at prayer time too. Just as right hemisphere exercises allow creativity to flow, centering my heart in Christ through prayer moments of solitude with Him will allow Him to freely move through me. Much like the drawing exercises that we do in class, I have learned to come to quiet time prepared. Repeating the words of the prophet Isaiah, "Here am I," helps me to be present to the Lord.

In order to meet Him in the busyness, I must meet Him in the center of my own heart, and that simply cannot be done if distractions interfere with my holy experience. I am a canvas of the Lord. If allowed, the artist of all creation would choose to use me to reflect His love to the world. As the canvas, I need to simply be, before I can ever do.

Father God,

Thank you for the creativity that surrounds me and even more I thank you for the lessons you continue to so eloquently teach me thorough simple, daily experiences. I want to meet you in the center of my heart. I ask you to guide me as I strive to come to you in the quietness, meeting you in completeness, releasing distractions. Father, hear the prayer of your child, "Here am I." Use me as your canvas Lord, as your will would have.

Amen







join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she can be found anxiously awaiting football season.

I'm a Fan!

I'm a fan.

It just happened that way. I was born in Pittsburgh in the late 60's. Legend has it that while babies were still in the hospital, a transfusion occurred, changing their blood from red to black and gold. I'm certain that it happened that way.

I grew up being a Steeler fan, then when I went off to college I became a Tiger fan.

I'm a fan. It's just that simple, or so I thought.

Last year my team, the Pittsburgh Steelers, made it to the Super Bowl. That is when it happened. My true fan colors came shining through. The game began and I was in control, for about 3 minutes.

Then, I screamed.

I cheered like a crazy woman.

I did an end zone dance.

In short I was not just a fan, I was a CRAZY fan.

A few days after the "big game," I was spending some quiet time with God, who I'm SURE is a Pittsburgh Steeler fan, and I felt a nudge. I began to think about what kind of fan am I? Just how CRAZY am I?

We find ourselves caught up in the game, whether it's a favorite football team, hockey team, nascar, college team, pro or tee ball. We get caught up in being a fan. Many of us have team jerseys and license plates that say we are proud to represent our team. We'll scream, cheer, dance and high five all in the name of "our team." Stadiums are filled to capacity with fans.

What about HIS team?

What kind of FAN am I?

Am I a "CRAZY for HIM" fan or a lukewarm fan?

"So, because you are lukewarm—neither hot nor cold—I am about to spit you out of my mouth."

Revelation 3:16

Each day I have an opportunity to "wear" the team colors, except they are not black and gold, they are;

" love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. " Galatians 5:22 - 23

I have an opportunity to cheer;

"We praise you, Lord, for all your glorious power. With music and singing we celebrate your mighty acts." psalm 21:13 nlt

and this team WILL be victorious;

"Everyone who is a child of God conquers the world. And this is the victory that conquers the world - our faith." 1 John 5:4 ncv

The arena is life. A true fan stands up and is counted. A true fan commits to her team, regardless of what the scoreboard says. A true fan is easy to spot, there is no doubt who's team she is on.

I am a fan. As a fan, I need to make sure that I'm acting like one, showing up for each and every game, each and every play, rain or shine, cheering with passion. Lukewarm fans are not what this coach is looking for.

After all, this team and it's head coach, never lose...never have, never will.

Are you a fan? Better yet, are you a CRAZY fan?

Just this week a book was put in my hands....called Crazy Love, call it coincidence, call it crazy...I'll just call it God speaking directly to me.

Father God,

Again you reveal a message to me in the midst of my daily life. I want to be a true, CRAZY fan. I want to always be in YOUR game, playing by YOUR rules and committed to YOUR will. It's in this game that I can find victory each and everyday. Help me Father to be that true, crazy fan. Help me to always walk in love and grace, never in selfishness and pride, for I know that the real victory lies only in you.

It's in Jesus' name I pray,

Amen







join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she can be found anxiously awaiting football season.

When the Wheels Fall Off

Everything was packed.

Everything was checked off the to-do list.

We even arrived at the airport with time to spare!

That's when it happened. The wheels fell off. The wheels of my suitcase just decided that they'd had enough and popped off just in time to reach "Delta Check In." The bag was barely under the 50 pound limit and it was heavy...too heavy to carry. There was nothing to do but send it off onto the conveyor belt, hoping that it would arrive at it's destination in tact.


On the other end, the fuchsia bag appeared on the conveyor belt and I was euphoric! Damage had been done, another wheel became a casualty and clothing was hanging out, but it had arrived. It became quickly evident that I was in need of a new bag, as soon as possible. We were able to find a store and we purchased another piece of luggage, and I began to transfer the contents of the broken bag into the new bag.


I stuffed.

I pushed.

I smashed.

The new bag just wouldn't hold all of it.


It all sounds so familiar. It sounds so familiar to my faith walk.

I come prepared. I show up early and in complete control only to find that the unexpected is certain to happen, the trials in life, and before I realize it, the wheels fall off. ("Consider it pure joy, when you face trials of many kinds. James 1:2) I'm left stranded with only one place to go.

I place it all on the conveyor belt. I send that broken baggage to Him, and I hope in the promises that it will arrive and be cared for, even when I can't see it. I see glimpses of Him, at the other end, where although damage has been done, it's not all lost. Trusting isn't easy, but sometimes it's all we've got left.

Then I am given a chance to have a "new piece of luggage." What do I do? I cling to all of the things that caused the wheels to fall off in the first place. I try and stuff it into the corners, hoping that no one will notice.

Only HE does.

He won't let me shut the new suitcase. I have to let go of some things, those things that put too much pressure on the wheels. The control, the pride, the unforgiving spirit. The new luggage simply won't hold it all. I have been given this gift of a "new suitcase," and if I don't want the wheels to fall off of this one, I've got to make some changes. I've got to lighten this load.

"For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."
Matthew 11:30

It's not easy, but without letting go, I will not be going anywhere. I came across a translation in The Message that just spoke to my heart. It was just so God to place it in my life to confirm the lesson He was teaching me in my broken suitcase.

"Now I'm glad ~ not that you were upset, but that you were jarred into turning things around. You let the distress bring you to God, not drive you from Him. The result was all gain, no loss."
2 Corinthians 7:9

Isn't that just like God? To bring about a life lesson in a broken suitcase.

A lesson that I needed... in a broken suitcase?

What's in your suitcase?

Mine needed a bit of re-packing...

Father God,

You have given me the gift of a new suitcase. It replaces the broken baggage of my life. Help me to surrender to YOU, what I need to pack into that bag of my life. Help me to unpack those things which keep me from you and from serving as your Son, Christ taught me to serve. Thank you Father for getting my attention in the daily details of my life. Help me always keep my eyes open to you. Thank you Father for traveling always with me.
In Jesus' name,
Amen






join Lori daily at her personal website,all you have to give, where she finds herself constantly packing and repacking, with a God who never tires of traveling with her.

I am so NOT Qualified

Let me think out loud for a minute.

I am defined by who I am and what I do. That IS how the world sees me.

The world tries to "qualify me" through what it sees I am "qualified" to do. The funny thing is that the list of things that I am unqualified to do is far longer than the " what I'm qualified to do" list.

I am not brilliant, (even my kids have figured that out), I am not a theologian or hold a P.H.D. I will likely not ever qualify for a Nobel Prize being that I don't have a "field."

I am, by the world's standards, not all that qualified.

BUT.....the beautiful news is that my God makes it HIS practice to not "CALL the qualified, but rather QUALIFY those HE calls."

That is really, really good news for a gal like me. A gal who has been known to be all the things HE is not. I have been CALLED, and all I have to do is allow HIM to qualify me.

I have been called to be a servant.

I have been called to be approachable.

I have been called to be full of grace.

I have been called to be peaceful.

I have been called to humility.

I have been called to be forgiving.

I have been called to be understanding.

I have been called to serve.

Let me be clear, on my own I am NOT qualified. On my own, I'm a mess. Just the other day I forgot my own debit card PIN number. I'm a broken daughter, and the funny thing is, THAT is exactly what HE is looking for. My willing heart is what HE is looking for, along with a submissive spirit and a servant's attitude. He promises me that He'll take care of the rest.

"With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may count you worthy of His calling, and that by His power He may fulfill every good purpose of yours and every act prompted by your faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ."

2 Thessalonians 1: 11-12

I admit it. I often am focused on how "unqualified" I am that I miss the "call." Perhaps it's the
fact that I'm genetically predisposed to being a woman, I don't know, but I know I miss it and it has nothing to do with Him.

The way it stands, we are ALL QUALIFIED. Each of us was created with those set of "qualifications" that make us unique and purposed by God. That's it, HE qualifies you.

The world does tend to send us the opposite message.



The fact is that YOU and I are qualified and we are called. All HE asks is that we LISTEN to what HE is calling us into. For each of us that will be something different. Take some time, truly listen to what HE is calling YOU to do. You likely will find yourself as I often do, tilting my head and saying, "HUH GOD." It's in that we TRUST that if HE calls, HE qualifies. You and I have been so called to do amazing things, beyond our wildest imaginations, if only we'll surrender and release HIM to qualify us.

Ponder This:

Do you EVER feel unqualified?

Do you share those intimate feelings with God?

How can you see God "calling" you the way He can "call" no other?

Prayer for today:

Father God,
I am unqualified. I know it. I know that alone, I will fail and fall and remain unqualified. I ALSO know that with your mercy and grace, I can do unimaginable things for your Kingdom. Help me to hear your voice calling my name. Help me Father, to not allow the world's standards of qualifications trample my spirit. Your Spirit lives in me and in You, I can do all things. Remind me that I am "worthy of Your calling, and that by Your power You may fulfill every good purpose of mine and every act prompted by my faith."

In Jesus' name,
Amen


If you still don't believe that God calls the UNQUALIFIED, take a look at this. He's never been in the business of only choosing the "QUALIFIED" people. Why would HE start now? I think I'll get in line, because in Him, I am QUALIFIED.

Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where she is happy to get in line with the UNQUALIFIED and allow God to show her just how QUALIFIED she is in Him.

Free to Be ME?

Let me be honest.

A confession if you will.

I'm a simple girl, but there are a few things that I really like. Besides chocolate, I love my comfy jeans. You know the ones. The ones with rips and tears that would send Clinton and Stacy into a tailspin if they saw me walking down the street. But I LOVE those jeans.

AND

I've always wanted an old truck. I envision a dirt road. Me in my ripped jeans, winding up the country road with a truck bed filled with flowers and fresh vegetables.




IMAGINE my surprise when I heard the lyrics for the first time.

"I've got a couple dents in my fender, got a couple rips in my jeans. Try to fit the pieces together, but perfection is my enemy."

I

It's been that way most of my life.

Perfection ~ trying to achieve the unachievable and trying to fit into the idea of what the world tells me just how perfect I should be.

Perfect wife,

Perfect mother,

Perfect size,

Perfect weight,

Perfectly beautiful,

Perfectly intelligent,

Perfect daughter and daughter in law,

Perfect friend,

Perfect employee,

Perfect teacher.

Speaking from experience, it's exhausting trying to live up to expectations of perfection. Especially your own.

Apparently, after listening to Francesca Battistelli's Free to Be Me, I'm not the only one out there.

It wasn't until God got a hold of my heart, beat down the door of perfection that it became clear. Perfection was my enemy. It was the door in which the enemy slid himself in and whispered lie after lie.

The lies led to nothing that was worthy or glorifying. It simply couldn't be. I was too worried about those other things, I had no idea what I was really missing. Listening to those lies led to an eating disorder and an emptiness that I couldn't put my finger on.

It was in finally in deadbolting and locking the back door that the enemy so discreetly snuck in and flinging wide OPEN the front door to my heart that God came.

God came beautifully ready to renew, restore and remake.

The lies surround us. They surround women I know who are well into their grandmothering years. We tend to think that these things leave us.

They don't.

They continue to attack us, those lies continue to discourage us, deceive us and defeat us. Leaving us left with doubt.

The WONDERFUL NEWS is that the lies are simply LIES. Hear me, please hear me, God loves YOU, EXACTLY where you are right now. Not "WHEN" or "IF" or "Sometime down the road", He LOVES YOU, EXACTLY where YOU find yourself at this moment.
The more time we spend believing the lies or trying to achieve perfection the less we are focused on Christ, and that is exactly where the enemy would love for you to stay.

I believe God loves the rips in my jeans.

They tell a story, the story of my life. My mistakes, my joys, my beginnings and my lessons learned. The story of my imperfect life and my need for Him to constantly "mend" me.

As for the "dents in my fender," well, they show that I've delivered three children, all miracles. They show 41 years under my belt. Those "dents" were earned, and are a symbol of the wisdom I've picked up along the way. Lessons learned. The good, the bad and the ugly. Those "dents" are my character, the character that only I possess.

Only I possess.

I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Wonderful are Your works,
And my soul knows it very well.
Psalm 139:14

Embrace those "dents in your fender and those rips in your jeans." God wants to see those dents and embrace the rips and together you'll be "sitting on HIS shoulder, free to be YOU!"

Francesca Battistelli's video is below. If you struggle with perfection, I encourage you to listen to it. It just may speak to your heart.

May you find Peace in knowing you are Free to be You!

Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where at the very least, she is embracing the "dents in her fender and the rips in her jeans," each day thankful that she is Free to Be in Him.

Separate and Together

"THEY" predicted they wouldn't make it.

In fact they insisted on it.

The folks at the nursery urged us not to buy the trees. When we insisted, they urged us to "save the receipt," because of the certainty that we would be bringing back the dead trees for a refund.

They were right.

Sort of.

One of the trees did succumb to the cold, but the other one has a mind of her own.

At the end of the driveway sits an unassuming little tree, but for one GLORIOUS week that tree fills the air with what I consider to be one of God's greatest smells. (that and fresh baked chocolate chip cookies)

Just the other day, I smiled to see those teeny tiny purple blooms ready to break open and each day I walked over to see, rather smell, and then when I least expected it, it happened,

They BURST OPEN!

As God tends to do, He revealed so much to me in those tiny, fragrant blooms.

That is really what they are....little tiny blooms, which on their own, smell nice.

I know because I pulled one off to smell it on its own. Apparently, so did most of the members of my family, for I've found little lilac flowers lying in unlikely places around my house.

I cut off a bouquet of the lilac branches and brought them inside, filled a glass jar and placed them beside the kitchen sink. Everyone who walked into the kitchen this week has commented on the "amazing" scent. The scent of those lilacs was unbelievable and for 7 glorious days, I was given a marvelous gift.

Then it occurred to me. The lilac flower on it's own was simply nice. It was the lilac flowers all together, resting on the branch that made the greatest impact. And thus the lightbulb went off!

This IS how Christ wants HIS church to be. He even tells us so!

"All of you TOGETHER are the one body of Christ, and each one of you is a separate and necessary part of it." 1 Corinthians 12:27 (TLB)

Each of us comes to the body as a flower, with a scent of our own, but when we unite TOGETHER, those separate individuals become ONE in that body of Christ.

I smiled.

God is so gracious to surround us with messages that we need to reinforce right where we are. It just so happens that we are a part of a plant church right now, and this message was not only timely, but profound for me.

A teeny tiny flower that would go unnoticed, if not for it's scent. The impact of those teeny tiny flowers when united and connected.... were so much MORE than they could ever be on their own!

My only wish is that I could somehow insert a "scratch and sniff" pod onto my screen and you could "smell" for yourself! The message is for each of us who are part of the Body of Christ, alone we are beautiful and perfect, but together we can impact that goes farther than we could EVER imagine.

Now that is a scent that is pleasing to God!

"Our lives are a fragrance presented by Christ to God...a life giving perfume."
2Corinthians 2:15

We ARE one body, and we do not stand alone.

Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where at the very least, she tries daily to see or smell the messages God has placed so graciously in her path.

Temptation Anyone?

Temptations...you all know what I'm talking about and it's not that Motown group of 5. It's the OTHER temptations in our lives.

They've been around since the dawn of time, and given their history, it's not likely they're going anywhere. Recently I came across a quote which put into perspective why there are times when we're tempted more than others:

“The weaknesses we see in the people of the Bible are the very weaknesses we ought to recognize in ourselves. Live Eve who ate the forbidden fruit we are vulnerable to temptation when we act on our own. Like Abraham, who lied about his wife to save his neck, we are vulnerable to temptation when we are scared. Like David, who slept with Bathsheba while his men were off to war, we are vulnerable to temptation when we are idle. Like Elijah, who wanted God to end his life, we are vulnerable to temptation when we are exhausted. Like Peter, who denied his Lord even after he promised to die for him, we are vulnerable to temptation when we are overconfident. In other words, we are vulnerable to temptation practically all the time.”
Phillip Graham Ryken

There is no question about it, I'm vulnerable when I'm exhausted, prideful, overconfident and scared. I'm not as likely to give into the temptations that swirl around me when I'm immersing myself in The Word. It's when I go it alone that the problems start. Looking back at my life, heck looking back at yesterday tells the story.

I snap at those I love when I'm exhausted.
I see things I don't need to see when I'm idle.
Lose a few pounds and forget the struggle it is and overconfidence leads to a "binge."

A REALIZATION came to me after reading this quote, I am VULNERABLE to TEMPTATION practically all the time.

Daunting?

It is, UNTIL I embrace the fact that I can, with the help of a Savior who DIED for ME, overcome each and every temptation that comes down the congested superhighway of life.

Clearly the temptations aren't going away, and THANKFULLY and CONFIDENTLY neither is my God.

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

We can be confident that Jesus taught us to pray these words as He knew the temptations of this world all too well. And with this in mind, I pray daily the prayer Jesus gave us, with particular attention to the words, "lead me not into temptation, and deliver me from evil."

Reflections:

When do you find yourself most vulnerable to "temptations?"

Spend some time this week paying attention to the times that you "fall" and ask our ever faithful God to help you. Journaling the times I fall to temptations has helped me to learn where my vulnerabilities lie.

Father,
I come to you today knowing that I cannot resist the temptations of life without your constant help in my life. Thank you for always being willing to hear my cries for help. Help me to be ever reliant on YOU, knowing that your plans for me are perfect. I want to live in your will, today and everyday.
Amen









Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where at the very least, she daily tries to resist the temptation of the chocolate in the pantry.

"I've Been There"

God astounds me.

God takes things that I think are meant for others and uses it to get my attention.

My Girl's Bible Study is doing Vicki Courtney's, His Girl and that week I shared with my girls Bible Study class Hebrews 4:15-16 with them.

For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.

We spent some time talking about the Jesus that they have in their lives. How THIS Jesus was human and HE was tempted in ALL the ways that they are tempted....

He was tempted to cheat.

He was tempted to lust.

He was tempted to stay mad.

He was tempted by jealousy.

He was tempted to let things steal his joy.

He was tempted IN EVERY WAY, not just in a few ways, EVERY WAY.

I reminded them NEVER to think of Jesus as a "guy" who walked an "easier" path then they do. He didn't. He faced EVERY temptation that they do. "It doesn't say SOME," I told them, "it says EVERY."

Bible study class ended but I took that lesson with me, and it resurfaced in a mighty way.


Jesus was tempted in EVERY WAY?
He was tempted to have a pity party, tempted to get bogged down with life's circumstances, tempted to turn away and take matters into His own hands, tempted to be aggravated?

The other night I was lying in bed praying at 3:00 a.m.
The list went on and on....


Prayers for a friend and fellow dancer of my daughters' who has been diagnosed with leukemia.
Prayers for a grieving friend.
Prayers about a family decision.
Prayers for another grieving family.
Prayers for a friend facing uncertain health issues.
Prayers for a friend whose son phoned her to tell her that one of the men in his Platoon had died in his arms.
Prayers for what apathy in the world.
The list went on....until somewhere around 5:00 a.m.

My spirit weary and my soul sad, I was tempted to let the sadness invade my spirit and keep me from going BOLDLY to the throne. Tempted to greet the day with a cynical view rather than with a spirit of hope and joy. It was sometime that morning, after a talk with my husband about how my spirit felt burdened, that this verse came flooding back to me.

"I've been there sister," Jesus whispered. "REMEMBER what I told you? I've been tempted to let the enemy steal my JOY, tempted to see the glass half full, and tempted to give up hope, tempted to take matters into my own hands and not let the Father lead. I've felt it all, remember I told you that in Hebrews 4:15 -16?"

I smiled with tears in my eyes.

That little reminder changed my perspective.
It changed my day.
It changed my Spirit.
What a gift we've been given. Our Savior FELT each and everything that we feel.

Because of that, He "gets" me.

In that HE gets what I'm feeling, because somewhere, sometime, HE felt it too. That makes me so thankful. Thankful that MY SAVIOR feels and understands me in ways that I can't put into words.

I cling to that.

I pray to one who has felt those very feelings that plague my soul and I leave restored and full of hope. I am ready to face whatever comes at me; praying unceasingly for those who need it.

All because Jesus took the time to remind me that HE felt it all too. He understands.

wow.

Father,
Simply I say thank you. Thank you for sending your Son to live and walk in complete humanness so that HE may understand my heart. In times when I am burdened, HE walks with me. In times when I lose hope, HE picks me up. In times when I feel the enemy stripping my joy and saddening my Spirit, HE whispers to me. Thank you Father for the gift of your Son, Jesus, the Jesus who understands.
Amen








Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where she continues to astounded by the graces of God.

The Best of Intentions

It begins with the very best of intentions.

"Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

Prayer area, snuggled in my bed, low light on ~ check

Bible ~ check

Devotional Study ~ check

Something to sip on ~ check

Pen, journal and anything else I've scooped up along the way ~ check

I have worked hard in "quieting my soul." I come prepared and if I'm being honest (and I am), I have to admit that sometimes it sounds like this:

"Father God, I want to put myself in a place of peace with you....
drats, I forgot to take meat out for dinner, and the girls owe money today for class; have to remember to write that check, trash goes out tomorrow and recycling too."

"Oops, I lost focus for a moment, but I'm back God. I want more than anything to be in your perfect will and oh man, that lesson plan for Friday, haven't done it yet and tomorrow if I get up early I can exercise, and I need to get the kids to get those thank you notes done, and I told them I'd bring cookies to class, what kind should I bake? I really have to get that hair color for my hair."

Again...I've lost my prayer focus.

I'm distracted not by the things that surround me physically, but the distractions in my mind. I've quieted myself and now I have to quiet my soul, and truly 'be still.'

“God never ceases to speak to us, but the noise of the world without and the tumult of our passions within bewilder us and prevent us from listening to him." Francois Fenelon

It frustrates me and I'm working on it. I imagine many women with to-do lists a mile long are plagued with the same distractions. We physically slow down, but we don't slow our minds down long enough to center ourselves on God, and yet we expect to 'hear' Him amidst the noises within our heads that disrupt our time of 'stillness.'

I have come up with a few things that work for a gal in perpetual motion like myself. Before I come to my "quiet time" I make my lists. All of the things that tend to distract me from my time with the Lord. The lists are a mile long some days, but if I make the list, then when I come to my time with the Lord I can focus on what He is saying and not on the tasks of the day. I can mention those things on the list that are troubling my heart and instead of it being a distraction, it becomes part of the prayer.

I've also learned how to not WAIT for quiet time to engage in a heart to heart with my God. This Martha spirit has learned to slow down a bit, and I've learned to pray my way through the day. I have a journal that I'm keeping with me so that when I'm sitting waiting to pick up a child, I can be seizing the quiet moment in the car.

I have tried for the past few years to "set aside" time, and in that I've neglected the opportunities of quiet that appear throughout the day. These "quiet moments" come in unlikely places, usually when I'm doing something that causes others to "scatter." Folding laundry, showering and coming home from dropping a child off at classes are ALL "be still and know that I am God" opportunities in the midst of a hurried life. I am learning that there are opportunities within the chaos to be "momentarily still" and utter a prayer of thanks for the warm water or the coffee that flows. There are times when I can still my soul within the daily demands. I don't have to completely shut down to let God in.

God knows my heart, He KNOWS that I long to have a conversation with Him that is intimate and constant. He understands where I am. He knows what I struggle with and it's in talking constantly to Him that I feel connected, really connected. He hears the interruptions that fill my day, and HE longs to be a part of it all. Talking to Him throughout the day has made it such that when I do 'stop' for the day, I can truly stop and 'be still' with Him, knowing that all along I've been sharing the details He longs to hear. It's in that peace that I can quiet myself and truly, in my quiet time, "BE STILL and KNOW that HE is GOD" (psalm 46:10).

I ponder a quote that I read some time back that has helped me in praying continually to God,

“There is not in the world a kind of life more sweet and delightful than that of a continual conversation with God.” Brother Lawrence

Father,
Guide me as I journey into a more intimate relationship with you. Help me to treat you as my best friend, chatting with you continually throughout the day. Help me to "sieze" the quiet moments that you carefully place in my day so that I may quiet my spirit and "be still," even for a few moments to hear your voice and feel your presence. I want to throw off all that hinders me, and I want to run the race with endurance. I want to feel your presence at my side, not just in the quiet moments but in the chaos that is daily life as well. It's involving YOU in every part of my day Lord that I will draw closer to you, and that is truly my heart's desire.
Amen








Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where she can be found finding Jesus in the daily details of her life. She is continually learning how to "be still."

The Well Worn Manger

"You will find a child wrapped in bands of cloth and lying in a manger."
Luke 2:12

I remember exactly why I bought them. They were NOT in the budget, but I wanted a Nativity that the "little people" could touch.

Touch they did. They imagined and played as if they were there.

I have memories of one or another toddling up to me with the Baby Jesus announcing, "Baby Gee!" Those camels and donkeys made the trip to Bethlehem more than once.

It's only when you look closely, that you see the GAPING hole in the Wise Man's head (a hole that would require surgery of enormous proportions). The camels and donkeys have lost ears in their time with us, the angel's star hangs on by a thread, and the crib that holds the baby Jesus.... well, it stands only on one leg, having to be sandwiched between Mary and Joseph.

I often find Baby Jesus lying upside down when I pass by, one run past the table or too much jumping from the floor above and he is shaken to the point of a faceplant that I have to "fix" the Savior several times a week...
There is something about baby Jesus laying there face down that just doesn't seem right.

At first glance they "look" just fine.

It's only upon further observation that you notice the flaws.
It reminds me of most of the people I know, including myself.
We are flawed, broken and worn, trying our best to pull it together for the outside world.

I walked by that set the other day and paused to notice how worn-out and broken those pieces looked. I thought silently that they are likely more "realistic" to how the REAL Mary, Joseph, shepherds, Magi and animals really felt out there. Not unlike how I often feel; broken, exhausted and as if someone has taken a piece of me and the world seems to say "no room here today."

Worn out, and yet at the same time, all of those present that night must have had an overwhelming peace, knowing that for a brief moment, they were experiencing something on Earth that was Divine.

Mom called last year and told me that she was trading in her manger set that looks JUST LIKE THIS ONE, with one exception, hers had not had little hands play with it, break it,

imagine with it. Hers has sat neatly,
and lovely under the tree and it remains in perfect condition.

"Do you want it?"

"YES, I would LOVE to have the set that isn't broken!"

Then I thought about it.
It was as if a voice spoke just loud enough for me to stop,
"But isn't that how you come to the manger?"

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.

Matthew 11:28 (New Living Translation)

I'd love to tell you that I'd get all dolled up for a visit to a stable. The fact of the matter is I come to the manger looking very much like that Nativity of mine. As much as I love the Master's rendition of that night in Bethlehem, I doubt that any of them looked as perfectly as they are depicted in the fine artist's mind. They were filthy, exhausted, fragile and broken themselves. That is how they arrived at the stable that night.

We come to the manger as our authentic selves.

Unbroken? Perfect? Without Flaws? That is who we are.

He doesn't want us to clean up and welcome Him in, rather He wants us to open that door and allow Him to see, gaping holes and all.

It's in the broken Nativity that I see the humanity of it all, the humanity of our authentic selves. We come seeking hope and peace. We come BECAUSE we are broken and in need of a Savior. He came so that we could approach that manger with the same peace that those there that night in Bethlehem felt, the peace that transcends all understanding. The peace found only in Him.

It is exactly how I come to the manger. Less than perfect, exhausted with a few rough edges that are still in need of smoothing out, and even embarassingly gaping holes at times. It became so clear to me that this is exactly WHY I need this manger.
It's me, it's us....

Get rid of the broken, imperfect, worn Nativity? NEVER.

It's the reminder I need.

That is who He was born for. The ones with the gaping holes, rough edges and flaws. He lie in a manger so that the lonely and exhausted could approach with hope.
The message is there, always has been I suppose, for anyone who cares to look closely enough.

Linger at the manger this year, look closely, bend low and allow your brokenness to show, after all He came into the world for you and me.

May the peace of the season be yours in renewed hope that only a baby in a manger can bring to a very broken world.







Join Lori daily at her personal blogspot, where she can be found finding Jesus in the daily details of her life.