Be All In for Him
She was standing up now, shouting at the guest speaker, “So how do we set boundaries for our husbands?”
“Noooo Lord, not now….” I groaned.
“Psssssssttt, share your heart.”
“Lord, I’m not doing it! If you want to me to, you’ll have to make me!” I thought smugly.
“…Laurel, why don’t you share the story of how you came tothis retreat with Betty.” The speaker broke the silence of my private conversation.
Groan… what was I thinking?!
I began to share how my husband was not saved and how when I’d asked him months before how he feel about me going to a retreat with all of the woman of my family, he was less than pleased at the thought. Who’d take care of our 3 children, including our 9 month old baby? This was a great time to practice what God had spoken to me about a meek and quiet spirit. I prayed…and prayed…and prayed.
The night before we were to go, my Mom called and asked if I was coming or what?
I said, “Well, if I’m not there in the morning, go without me. ”
My mom asked what I’d do if he really did say no?
I said, “He won’t. I know that God is in control. This is His plan.”
Truth is, if he had, I’d have been totally okay with it because I had given it to Christ to do with as HE willed. Right after hanging up with Mom, the phone rang, calling my husband to work. I thought that was the answer since he couldn’t work and watch the kids. He got off of the phone and said, “That’s it! You can go!”
I replied in utter astonishment, “WHAT?” He said, “I couldn’t commit to keeping the kids with work looming but if your Dad will keep them while I work, it will be great.” So my Dad and my brother (bless their hearts) kept our kids while all the wives headed off to the retreat.
At this point, she looks like she might come right across the room.
“WHAT?” she yells. “You are a doormat, that is what you are! That’s just STUPID!” The little veins in her neck were bulging out and my knees were shaking now. I whispered, ‘um Lord, a little help here…’
In God I have put my trust; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?
“No it isn’t. It’s just what God asks me to do. Maybe He wouldn’t ask the same of you. We don’t set boundaries for our husbands, we give them to God and pray for the wisdom to follow His lead in our marriages.”
Upon returning to my room I found, you can’t imagine, my roommate was Betty!! God looks down and giggles I am sure! I hurried to bed before she could see me.
A new day, I excitedly made my way outdoors for a bit of quiet peace by the lake. I sat down to gaze at the beauty.
“I want to talk to you,”
The voice began, “About yesterday, I’m really sorry. God was speaking to my heart with what you said and I didn’t want to hear it. I was throwing a bit of a tantrum. Thanks for sticking with me. I really appreciate your heart.”
Yes, it was Betty.
See, while that was way out of my element – it wasn’t out of God’s element. I’m so thankful that He pushes me past myself, and into Him; moves me from emotion into faith. That is what He asks of us.
Next time I hear a ‘psst’, I’m all in!
Thank you Father for loving us when we say no and when we want to throw a tantrum. Thank you for increasing our faith with your tender love. Continue to teach us how to move from emotion into faith, and then faith into action. AMEN
You can meet me for coffee at my blog, From My Heart to Yours.