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Sunday, May 25, 2008

Faith and Time

This past week marked four years since the near drowning accident of our youngest child, Isabelle. I am not one to mark time by dates, and am not usually bothered by dates in general. I noticed many people around me do put a lot of weight on days and dates, anniversaries and milestones. Many friends called to "check" on me as the date approached. I imagine they wondered how I would deal with the knowledge that four long years have passed and although there has been progress made in the overall health and well being of Isabelle, it is no where near the completed product that is being hoped and prayed for. Will the passing of time cause my faith to waiver? The devil is very clever in the way he puts little thoughts in your ear about what these milestones mean. The funny thing is to me they mean absolutely nothing except that we have come this far and are on the right road, leading us on this journey.

If someone had shown me a glimpse of my life, or more specifically my heart just a few short years ago I would have thought it wasn't a possibility. I have to say I rather enjoyed my naive bubble of a life I lived in for so many years. It is nothing, nothing compared to the wild ride I'm on now. I have come to know Jesus as my personal savior. I have come to know God as my deliverer, my everything. Instead of keeping the Father, Son and the Holy Spirit in a little box tied with a pretty bow, He lives!! He lives in my life and in the lives of the people around me. It is an awesome discovery.

I remember a time, years ago, that I almost envied those who were new in the church. I saw the spark in their eyes and the desire in their hearts to serve God. I felt that God was too common place because I simply took Him for granted, having always had Him and having always had "church." This is not true. I took Him for granted because I never gave Him the opportunity to move in my life in a real way. Sure I prayed for things, and even received from God... but that was only a little part of the whole package. God is bigger than that and capable of more. To know that He wants me... ME... to participate in a relationship with Him is amazing. To know that He sent His one and only Son so that I might have life eternal... amazing. To know that He is watching me and cares for me... amazing!

I can't say that I have arrived, I am still traveling on this road. I am excited for what tomorrow will bring. I am happy to think of the people God will put in my path over the next week, month, years... Faith really is the confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see.

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.
Hebrews 11:1

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Blogger Becoming Me said...

What a beautiful post. You moved me to tears.

May 25, 2008 at 12:46 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

God bless you for a very touching post!! What a beautiful post to contemplate this Sunday.

May 25, 2008 at 1:58 PM  
Blogger Denise said...

Such a heart blessing post, thank you.

May 25, 2008 at 3:34 PM  
Blogger lori said...

I have followed your story for some time now...your journey...and I am not alone in saying that you moved me to tears as well. I am moved by the way you have CHOSEN to see these circumstances...this "wild ride." God is bigger and far more capeable...all HE ever really wants is US....

We are blessed to have you on this part of the journey with are indeed a blessing, your story a testimony and we are grateful that you are sharing here with us....Your wisdom and faith are encouraging to me personally...thank you for that...

Living Hebrews 11:1 with you....

May 25, 2008 at 4:02 PM  
Blogger Julie said...

Your post makes me think of the scripture in Job.
Job 42:5 "My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you."

What I read in your post is that you knew of God. You had given your life to Him....but NOW you have seen Him in your life, vibrant, alive, mighty to Save.....

I identified with Job in those verses during the wilderness of jobs. My husband had 6 jobs in 4 years all paying thousands less than our living expenses. I SAW God. I will never be the same.

During that time He became a verb in my life. He was the action. I was the subject. It was an amazing time of transformation that has continued to the point that I am ruined for the ordinary.

Thanks for sharing your heart.

May 25, 2008 at 5:06 PM  
Blogger windycindy said...

I did not know about your experience with your daughter! We never know what life is going to throw at us,
do we?! In 2000, I lost my only brother and my mom four months apart!
Most of the time I felt like I was in a fog just to get through all of the hospital visits and then the funerals. If I didn't have faith, I am not sure what would have become of me. God bless.....Cindi

May 25, 2008 at 5:09 PM  
Blogger Susan said...

Hi Annie,

This is my first time reading one of your posts, and oh my!!

I was so deeply touched by what you shared.

Your daughter is beautiful, and you've been through so much.

Our lives have been touched by childhood cancer, so I know what you mean about God using our experiences for HIS glory and all the people He has brought in our lives because of it.

Your faith is refreshing, and such a testimony to the faithfulness of our mighty God.

So nice to meet you!


May 28, 2008 at 10:17 PM  
Blogger baby~amore' said...

I'm here from Missy's blog ... I don't know Isabelle's story but this post is very inspiring .
Yes what a testimony to your unwaivering faith.
My Little Drummer boys
warm regards

May 31, 2008 at 6:27 AM  

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