Let Go and Let God...
"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things." ~ Philippians 4:8 (ESV)
Sunday afternoon I was not in a very pleasant mood, believe me. You know how you plan out things just to scrap (pun intended) all your plans? Well, that was me Sunday...
All week I had planned to scrap some baby pictures of our son. I wanted to create some lasting memories for my little digi-scrap book; since the pictures just have been in a box for over 20 years. I had some of them scanned during the week, picked out the digi-supplies I wanted to use. Around noon time our son came up with the idea that he needed pants, that he needed 'stuff' for his apartment. To top things off, he wanted to keep the student loan payment because he needed to make all these purchases. I almost blew my top...
"Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand;" ~ Philippians 4:4-5 (ESV emphasis mine)
Huffing and puffing I went the bathroom praying..."Lord, really, where is the reason here. Why do I always have to scrap all my plans to be there for Daniel..." -- It never fails - God showed up to change my heart. There was something deeper than just the scrapped scrap-booking project, was there? For goodness sake! The pictures have been in a box for over 20 years.
You know what the issue is/was? I am scared. I am scared that I have failed to raise our son properly. Can he wash his own clothes? Can he prepare a meal other than Raman Noodles or scrambled eggs? He doesn't have his drivers license-how will he get around? Will he pay his bills on time? All these questions flooded my mind.
The 15 minutes I spent in the bathroom praying changed everything. I knew the root of my foul mood. I felt that I did not prepare our son for a life away from home. God calmed my spirit and changed my mood. Needless to say, I enjoyed the time shopping with our son. He showed me that he can take care of himself. We bought clothes together, he picked out some towels for his apartment...we had fun. If you are wondering about the student loan payment...our son gave me the money.
"I can do all things through him who strengthens me." ~ Philippians 4:13 (ESV)
Lord of Heaven and Earth. Thank You so much for changing my heart on Sunday afternoon. I am glad that You are there to guide my heart, mind and spirit. I know that I need to let go and let You take care of the rest. I am trusting in Your mercy. In the precious name of my Lord and Savior, in Jesus' name I pray ~ Amen.
You can also find me at my personal blog Sting My Heart