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Monday, March 5, 2007

Options...

I sensed that something wasn’t right by the tone in her voice, the way she turned the monitor away from my view, and the discomfort she expressed before excusing herself from the room. Something was terribly wrong—again.

A solemn look washed over the doctor’s face as he walked into the room. “There seems to be a problem, …” he said as he began to explain the severity of what they were viewing on the monitor.

I was sent for fetal assessment where they could survey the situation in detail. It was all too familiar a place, since I had been a regular there in the past. The same doctor who urged me to consider “my options” was there, as well as the nurse who made it abundantly clear that I “still had time to abort.” The smile on my face, and the calm reply to their horrifying news gave them only one conclusion—she doesn’t get it. Perhaps that’s why they called my husband at work, and rang me at home several times--to make sure that we did.

We sat in the same office again looking at a new little being, marvelously and wonderfully made. Being only six inches long, his kidney was already enlarged to about an inch. “This one is a case far worse than the last. He will have severe kidney problems if he even makes it to term. You have options…”

The only option I had was that of prayer. And we did pray, fervently and in faith before God.

Lying in bed one night alone in the dark, I felt the gentle voice of God whisper, “Nathaniel,” in my ear. Nathaniel? I wondered, Why Nathaniel? It hadn’t been a name that had ever crossed my mind.

I jumped out of bed, clicked on the lamp, and flipped through the pages of my reference Bible till my finger rested on the words… Nathaniel: Gift from God.

I turned that name around in my thoughts the next day wondering why. Why “gift from God?” why not John or Mark, Luke, or Ichabod—why? Until the answer came to us, clearly and directly as though God was speaking Himself.

Sitting in my living room that very night a woman prayed, “Every day that this child lives is a gift from you, Lord.” We knew from that very second that his name would be Nathaniel.

I went back to fetal assessment for what would be the fourth look at the little man that God was forming inside me. The child who gave me only one option, and that option was to pray--and pray fervently before God. The little man who, one day, would be my living, breathing, giggling, praying, cart-wheeling, hand-holding gift from God--my Nathaniel.

After looking at the screen, the nurse excused herself from the room.

I sensed that something was right by the tone in her voice, the way she turned the monitor away from my view, and the confusion she expressed before excusing herself from the room. Something was very right.

An astonished look washed over the doctor’s face as he walked into the room. “There seems to be a mistake, …” he said as he began to explain the miracle of what they were viewing on the monitor.

The confused look on his face, and their inability to explain this miracle gave me only one conclusion--they didn’t get it. Perhaps that’s why God called me to their office several times--to make sure that they did.

Martin Luther said, "To be a Christian without prayer is no more possible than to be alive without breathing." In Nathaniel’s case, as with most of my children that’s true in the literal sense.

When pain rips through your life taking down everything you’ve tried so hard to hold on to--perhaps even life itself, your left with only one option and that option is to pray--and pray fervently before God.

Iris is hosting "In 'Other' Words" this week. Head over to Sting My Heart to read her take on the quote and meet other participants.

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24 Comments:

Anonymous eph2810 said...

I love reading about you and your family...I love the story about Nathaniel. He truly is a gift of God...As all your children are.

Darlene, this post brought tears to my eyes. Tears of joy that He never ceases to show us His might hand in our lives.

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this week's IOW quote.

March 5, 2007 at 11:01 PM  
Blogger The Preacher's Wife said...

Wow...I have cold chills..What a gift every time we have the opportunity to make our God famous!

March 5, 2007 at 11:08 PM  
Blogger Chris said...

Wow! What an awesome God we serve.

March 5, 2007 at 11:25 PM  
Blogger Denise said...

Praise God for He is wonderful, thanks for sharing this.

March 6, 2007 at 1:26 AM  
Blogger MiPa said...

Oh Darlene, you can make me cry and laugh in the same post. What a gift you have to tell a story. I'm smiling at "they just don't get it." I hope that someday/somehow they did get it. Thank you for sharing this story--I really needed a reminder that miracles happen today. Bless you!

March 6, 2007 at 3:26 AM  
Blogger Jennifer said...

Darlene-

Your post gave me chills. I, too, had a sense that God was with you on that journey. What a testimony to the awesome power of prayer!

Blessings-
Jennifer

P.S. Is there a feed for the Internet Cafe?

March 6, 2007 at 6:43 AM  
Blogger Laurel Wreath said...

This gave me goose bumps, it is beautiful!!

March 6, 2007 at 7:18 AM  
Anonymous Lynn Donovan said...

Oh Darlene,

Nathaniel... Gift from God. This post is exceptional. I see God's finger prints all over your life.
Love this quote. Blessings, Lynn

March 6, 2007 at 8:45 AM  
Blogger Butterfly Kisses said...

WOW! Your post gave me chills.

And I loved how the second time in your story, when you went to the doctor, how you said..
--they didn’t get it. Perhaps that’s why God called me to their office several times--to make sure that they did.
Loved that!!!!

March 6, 2007 at 9:20 AM  
Blogger Erin said...

I found this through someone's blog. What a beautiful story! It's a goosebump story! I love God moments like these that show His true and real sovereignty. In our weekly Bible study we've been trying to get everyone to see the God is bigger than the box we put Him in. Thank you for sharing your "out of the box" story!

March 6, 2007 at 10:47 AM  
Blogger Bonnie W said...

A beautiful story about a beautiful little boy.
Bonnie

March 6, 2007 at 10:48 AM  
Blogger ChupieandJ'smama said...

A beautiful story about prayer and love and faith. AND a beautiful little boy.

March 6, 2007 at 11:24 AM  
Blogger Crystal said...

Thank you Darlene for sharing.....I have tears in my eyes...God is so good isn't He? What a cute little guy you have!
Blessings

March 6, 2007 at 11:38 AM  
Blogger Darlene said...

Jennifer, Iris said that she'll help me with that tonight.

__________________________

Iris, thanks for hosting this week. :)

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Preacher's Wife, yes God deserves fame and glory.

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Chris- Totally Awesome!

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Denise ~ You're welcome. I think He's wonderful too.

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Crystal - God is good--amen! My little guy is so cute. There's more to the photo though, I'm doing the same thing, but I cut myself out. :)

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Chupieandj'smama, Thanks for the commment and for stopping by.

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Bonnie, yes, he's my beautiful little gift.

______________________________

Erin, I like that idea, "taking God out of the box" We do box Him in too often than not. Even our human understanding itself is sort of a box in a way.

March 6, 2007 at 2:37 PM  
Blogger Darlene said...

Butterfly Kisses, thanks for the comment and the link back today.

________________________________

Lynn, even to see God's fingerprint on one of my children is amazing. And yet He's been there over and over again through the life of each one.

______________________________

Laurel, thank you.

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Mipa, Good laughs and cries I hope. :) lol. Yes, I hope they got it too.

______________________________

March 6, 2007 at 2:41 PM  
Blogger Faerylandmom said...

Wow. What a mighty God we serve! That is truly amazing and wonderful. And to think that God chose YOU to minister to that doctor who said you had "options." One more reason to trust the God who made you and Nathaniel, isn't it?

March 6, 2007 at 3:50 PM  
Blogger Guinevere Meadow said...

What an incredible story. Childbirth in and of itself is such a miracle (which only those of us who have been through it can truly understand,) but something like that is even MORE powerful. Had Chris and I been in a different century, he wouldn't have survived childbirth, and likely neither would I. Praise God for each and every little (and BIG) miracle that He performs daily.

March 6, 2007 at 5:21 PM  
Blogger At A Hen's Pace said...

What an amazing story. Thank you for sharing it today!

Jeanne

March 6, 2007 at 11:01 PM  
Blogger Darlene said...

Faerylandmom, yes, it is one more reason to trust God. There are so many reasons to trust Him, it's innumberable. What an awesome God!

__________________________________

Jeanne, thanks. I'm glad that I shared it too. I've often talked about this story, but putting it into written words brings yet more glory to God. Praise His wonderful name.

March 7, 2007 at 10:59 AM  
Blogger Christine said...

You are so inspiring! And I have a miracle too- one that had little chance of getting out of prematurity unscathed. But she is an amazingly healthy and spunky little girl. God taught me so much through Maddy, and still is teaching me! I loved hearing about your Nathaniel.

March 7, 2007 at 7:08 PM  
Blogger Darlene said...

Christine, we both have a miracle, and we both have a Maddy too.

I'd love to read about your miracle one day too.

March 7, 2007 at 10:03 PM  
Blogger Carol said...

Bravo, God!

March 10, 2007 at 8:21 AM  
Blogger Darlene said...

Carol, I'm cheering with you! :) God is an awesome God.

March 14, 2007 at 7:17 PM  
Blogger Elise said...

I love your "full circle" posts - the way the doctors reactions changed. I echo Carol - "Bravo, God!"

March 18, 2007 at 5:19 PM  

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